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The Coaching with Compassion Sessions
Name
OBLD 641 Resonant Leadership: Leading Change
School
Professor
Date
The coaching process requires one to maintain an open mind and communicate with the coach for better results. A coach can help one understand themself and realize their potential through rising above societal expectations and personal weaknesses. During a coaching session, the mood that one starts with differs from the one with which they progress and end the session. Furthermore, since a coach is well vested in leadership and theories that can help a person improve, they can integrate some concepts in their sessions and help one adopt them for their improvement (Boyatzis et al., 2013). In my session, the coach asked questions to guide me toward opening up about certain aspects of my life. They used concepts such as Renewal, the Physiology of Emotional Intelligence, Intentional Change Theory, Ideal Self, Coaching with Compassion, and Mindfulness.
Occurrences during the Session
The session involved delving deep into my life, dreams, visions and goals. The coach targeted my response to elements such as my history in education, career and leadership and how factors influence them. The aim of the engagement was the creation of a mental picture of the situation I was in and where I saw myself. I talked about my career in the military, my philosophy and principles and how I perceived leadership. By talking about my career process, educational goals, family engagement and leadership dreams, I gave the coach an overview of my life and an opportunity to understand my goals from my point of view.
The session included a discussion about my ideal self and the elements preventing me from actualizing that self. Ideal self means the ability of a person to identify their desires and core values which help a person achieve their vision (Boyatzis et al., 2013, b). I listed accountability, honesty, and trust as my leadership philosophies and focusing on them could help me reach my ideal self. Discussing the ideal self-led to a discussion about the weaknesses and personal issues hindering the achievement of an ideal self-meant looking at my real self. I had to write some points about the ideal self and the elements that separate it from the real self. We discussed all five steps in Intentional Change Theory and incorporated some pointers about resonant leadership, compassion coaching and emotional intelligence.
The Class Concepts Used
The session led to the inculcation of some class concepts such as Renewal, the Physiology of Emotional Intelligence, Intentional Change Theory, Ideal Self, Coaching with Compassion, and Mindfulness. These concepts were used to explain the process of change and achievement of the ideal self while realizing resonant leadership and compassion. The concept of renewal was about how a person works towards rebuilding themselves and living a new life. Renewal happens once a person changes.
Physiology of Emotional Intelligence
On the other hand, there is the Physiology of Emotional Intelligence which means understanding the mental processes involved in understanding emotions. Emotions are controlled by the amygdala and the midbrain parts of the brain (Peña-Sarrionandia et al., 2015). As such, through experiencing some sensations, the brain reacts by triggering certain responses. When it comes to emotional intelligence, it means the ability of a person to perceive and access their emotion for the understanding of self and others and intellectual growth. In coaching, understanding emotions is key to self-including one’s weaknesses and strengths (Peña-Sarrionandia et al., 2015). The mental processes involved in emotional development help one to understand the influences that trigger an emotional response, which can lead to mastery of control and emotional intelligence. Through emotional intelligence, one can understand and control their emotions, express their opinions, solve problems and develop better social relationships with others (Taner & Aysen, 2013). In a way, emotional intelligence is a direction toward resonant leadership.
Intentional Change Theory and Ideal Self
The theory of intentional change outlines some important steps that one can follow to make necessary adjustments to achieve their personal visions and goals. First, there is an ideal self-stage, where a person outlines the way they perceive themselves and the personal visions they want to achieve (Halton, 2018). Second, there is the real self, where a person looks at their current position and the reality of their life and how it differs from the ideal self. Third, one creates a program or strategy for the achievement of their ideal self and ways to implement them (Boyatzis et al., 2019). Fourth is the practice and experimentation, where one actualizes what they have planned and makes adjustments to help them achieve their ideal self. Fifth is maintaining the right relationship with a support system and repeating the process (Halton, 2018). During the session, these steps were outlined to help me create a strategy on what to achieve and the process.
Coaching with Compassion and Mindfulness
Coaching with compassion leads to growth and development. It is a way to help people realize their leadership capabilities and work towards elevating them. Furthermore, it extends to the elevation of a person’s compliance which leads them to meet success within a team or an organization. It means guiding a person with genuine understanding, concern and care and offering the necessary support to facilitate self-discovery and pursue the designed dreams (Boyatzis, 2019). Through helping a person identifies and focus on their ideal self, coaching with compassion leads to developing an optimistic sense of life (Dhar et al., 2021). Coaching with compassion works well when the person is mindful means they are self-aware and aware of their eternal atmosphere. It leads to resonant leadership, where people can create social bonds and relate to their teammates and co-workers. Resonant leadership means one can lead others and still function at their level (Halton, 2018). It means having values and principles that allow one to be relatable such as care, understanding, communication, accommodating and motivation, which makes a person a good leader (Taner & Aysen, 2013). As such, despite being assertive, honest, and trustworthy, a leader must also be approachable and respectful to the employees and teammates
The Mood at the Beginning, During and After the Session
At the beginning of the session, I was guarded and uncertain of what to share. I had no idea how the interaction would impact me and my perception of myself. As such, the coach did most of the talking, and I answered the questions as briefly as possible. In the middle of the session, things became more engaging. I felt comfortable expressing myself and being genuine about my visions and current state. It became more of a conversation than a session. After the session, I was reflective. I took all I had learned about myself and started envisioning the possible ways to improve. I was motivated to work on making the changes, felt more confident about my dreams and planned on attending more sessions since I found them insightful.
Outcomes of the Session
The session taught me several things about my role in making the changes needed to become my ideal self. I did not expect the session to become intense and an eye-opener. It was a way to help me see the reality of my life and the undesirable areas, which was difficult. The sessions will push me to be mindful and follow the steps to achieve my ideal self and become a resonant leader.
References
Boyatzis, R. E. (2019). Coaching with intentional change theory. Professional coaching: Principles and practice, 221-230.
Boyatzis, R. E., Smith, M. L., & Beveridge, A. J. (2013). Coaching with compassion: Inspiring health, well-being, and development in organizations. The Journal of Applied Behavioral Science, 49(2), 153–178.
Boyatzis, R. E., Smith, M. L., Van Oosten, E., & Woolford, L. (2013). Developing resonant leaders through emotional intelligence, vision and coaching. Organizational Dynamics, 42(1), 17-24.
Boyatzis, R., Smith, M. L., & Van Oosten, E. (2019). Helping people change: Coaching with compassion for lifelong learning and growth. Harvard Business Press.
Dhar, U., Schaffner, J. J., & Smith, W. A. (2021). Coaching with compassion. Positive psychology coaching in the workplace, 483-496.
Halton, A. M. (2018). Intentional change theory, coaching and leader effectiveness (Doctoral dissertation, Queensland University of Technology). https://eprints.qut.edu.au/115537/
Peña-Sarrionandia, A., Mikolajczak, M., & Gross, J. J. (2015). Integrating emotion regulation and emotional intelligence traditions: a meta-analysis. Frontiers in Psychology, 6, 160. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2015.00160
Taner, B., & Aysen, B. (2013). The role of resonant leadership in organizations. European Scientific Journal, 9(19).
